WAW not admitting to affair #3

[Oxford1]

so i am taking action against my list from the DB coach

- keep things non-emotional (reverse of what I did yesterday smile....JUST WILL CONTINUE TO WORK ON THIS
- give her space...TOUGH WHEN WE SHARE THE SAME HOUSE BUT ONLY TEXTING ABOUT KIDS STUFF
- if she wants to talk, just listen...I DID THAT THIS MORNING
- GAL and be a bit mysterious...THIS SEEMS TO ANNOY HER WHEN I DO THIS...I DID IT SUNDAY NIGHT AND WAS OUT LAST NIGHT FOR A WORK EVENT (I HAD TOLD HER ABOUT THAT)
- show her my good qualities...I HAVE BEEN DOING THAT EVERYDAY, BEING A GREAT DAD, BEING POSITIVE
- Detach: this is her journey, not mine
- be pleasant, act as if...I DID THIS LAST NIGHT, CAME IN, ASK HOW HER EVENING WAS, ASKED ABOUT THE KIDS, BUT DID NOT MENTION THE A OR ANYTHING ELSE
- the best thing to do is to NOT do certain things...look at what has not worked and DO NOT do them again
- create a safe environment for her to come back to (if she wants)...I THINK I WILL CREATE THIS BY NOT PUTTING PRESSURE ON HER, GIVING HER SPACE
- be kind and decent, don't give her a reason to think I am argumentative or controlling...SAME AS ABOVE
- really work on what is and is not controlling. Do not think that I actually understand this. I clearly do not understand it and need to work on it...I AM SCHEDULED TO SEE A THERAPIST ON FRIDAY

Keep in mind that you should not pursue her, let her come to you. That is one item I have been really good at. I find this really helps a lot. Because when she comes to you, to talk, to give you a kiss , to whatever, it's because she wants to.
I found when she did even positive actions and I had pursued her, I would question in my brain if it was genuine or to appease me. WHY PUT YOURSELF through those emotions.

I also recommend that you don't try to figure out her emotions especially if she snaps at you or is a little standoffish . That really can cause resentment and anger to build up. The one thing Mr. bond kept getting on me about was that some of my comments to WW where out of anger. Drop the anger...