Shining, it's important to only own your own stuff. So, let go of not seeing the signs of MLC. Many people not in one buy motorcycles and trucks.
My friend, TVS, is right. MC does not work with MLC. At least not at this point. Maybe way down the road.
In his mind, he was extremely unhappy. So, he lashed out at the person closest to him. It's what they do. It's the easiest fix in their mind.
They often affair way down. They pick someone really screwed up that they feel they can save. Makes them feel better about themselves...or so they think.
You have been through a lot. I am glad you got you and your kids safe.
The thing about dbing is that is saves you and sometimes, it saves marriages. It is, in my opinion, the best shot at that.
It helps to remember that this is a marathon, not a sprint. Dealing with an MLCer isnt for the faint of heart.
So, keep looking within and try to figure out how to be your best self....for you. Your changes have to be real or he will see right through them.
It's a good idea to get a roadmap together on how you want to walk this. I had some things that were important to me. Having the roadmap helped keep me on track.
I knew that when I looked back on this time, I wanted to be able to see that I had acted with dignity. I wanted to be sure to cause no harm to the relationship between my son and his dad. I tried each day to be the person I wanted to be. Some days I made it, some I didnt. But that was always the goal.
He needs to walk this on his own. It's the best shot he has of coming out the other side. He has to get himself strong to face his demons. He cant do that if he is looking over his shoulder at you.
He has asked for space....give it to him. He knows where you are.
Let every interaction be a positive one. Look good, be positive, head high.
You have been doing some good introspection. Keep digging deep. You want to be good and strong. So that if he looks to you in the future, you can decide what you want from a place of strength.
