Summary of the facts: H moved out 1 month ago. Said ILYBNILWY etc etc. Found out later that there was OW/EA at work who was also a friend of mine. PA started the day he moved out I believe...don't know if it continued or not.
So today I called out my H on the OW. I know I know, not supposed to do that. But the time was right and I just calmly stated I heard they were dating. He denied it and was super angry that someone would spread lies about him. (they may not be "dating" but I know for a fact they were sleeping together a few weeks ago at least, and lots of people saw them together)
His reaction was interesting. Very angry and aggressive.
I was calm and said it was none of my business since we are not together.
He said he is not dating her, but he is online dating. He told me he was mad that someone would try to hurt me by telling lies and that he is trying to be a good ex-husband. !!??
He seemed very angry, defensive and aggressive but I remained calm for the most part. And mostly I just agreed with him and didn't let what he said bother me.
We had been trying to arrange a time to meet for drinks (the first time we'd meet or even speak since he moved out) but hadn't found an opportunity. He seemed to feel rejected because when he asked I always said I was too busy, maybe later. His rejection came across as bitter and angry.
I remained calm and said I could meet tomorrow. So that is that. We meet tomorrow.
If any of you have been following my saga I was very very nervous to meet him because I thought he would drop a bomb. Now it doesn't matter that much because I already called him out on it and I think I can handle the stupid things he is bound to say.
He seems to be regretful that he "had to" break up with me. And then angry about being accused of something hurtful he actually did, but lies and says he didn't. But he is talking like he still believes that we should not be together. Like it is hard but hey it is for the best. And he is throwing in my face that he is dating other people...but not the specific one I know he actually did sleep with...
Any words of advice from you vets out there?
I plan to be calm, relaxed and fun tomorrow and keep it superficial. Look pretty and be friendly and happy. I guess if he continues to talk about how he isn't dating the OW I should just pretend to believe him and change the subject?
I'd love some advice about his anger and denial and how he seems convinced that he did the right thing by leaving me... and how I should handle our first meeting.
Thanks in advance! Hugs, Lisa
Me: 34 H: 30 M: 4 years BD: 6/15/14 He moved out 6/30/14 OW1: EA then PA after BD Now he's dating multiple OWs I'm over it and moving on.
