Thanks for the honest feedback and pep talk. We left our convo with her insisting they were just friends and that they are commiserating with each other. Probably how it started obviously. I know she is lying but clearly my not believing her story set her off.
Last night, I went over to see some friends and came home around 9pm. She was in bed and did not really speak with me. After 10 min of me in bed with her. she took her book and slept downstairs on the couch. This morning, I saw her, said good morning and we chatted briefly about her and my day. I have work plans tonight, so I won't be home. I believe she will be in NYC Wed/Thr.
One thing that I know is that if we don't work on our R and M, and we do divorce with a lot of resentment and issues going unresolved, the kids will be hurt in the long run. They need two parents who can be parents together, even if they are divorced. Not parents with resentment towards each other. And we cannot work on that until she is honest with me and of course, drops the OM.
Not sure how I say that to her. I said most of that yesterday but not the point about our relationship post divorce. ANY ADVICE?
My goals for this week: - find a therapist to help me with this M and my control issues - speak with my DB coach today - Find ways to GAL...I have seen some friends that past few nights, who have been super supportive. They said to come by whenever. It does help to chat with people about my sitch and just do something without her on my mind (tough to do)
I also need to get my mind ready for being a single/divorce parent. I need to detach from her.
The just friends is always a cover up for an EA. When I caught my wife last year, first she cries to me and says I love him I need to call and make sure he got home safely.
Then when I blocked his numbers on the cell phone I pay for she was crying and carrying on like a little girl whose BFF just moved.
Then of course I thought there was no contact etc..
Now she's back to the we are just good friends there is no PA. Meanwhile I know he thinks he's her husband and she has been spending crazy hours showing him around. Just good friends my arse!
Remember don't believe anything she tells you! I just tell you a little of my history so you can see how ridiculous they sound...but they all sound the same.
Oh and the Disney thing can be to just get you angry! Don't act like it bothers you. Don't ask if you can go...believe me I learned this from experience...the best acting my WW did was on a family vacation two weeks after DD1 and 6 weeks before DD3!
