Ready for some forum help

[sandi2]

You are panicking. Get a grip and calm yourself down before you really mess up big. These things are not worked out in a day or two. Patience is a must!

I am hoping some honest, open discussion can help her see this is not the answer

.

I know what you mean, but you can't talk your way out of this problem. You have a WAW. Her heart is closed to you. Relationship talks won't fix this right now. You have to back off and leave her alone.

She wants to be best friends....co parent, says we will see each other all the time...etc

.

Did you know almost every WAW says this very thing?

I feel she sees my detachment as her getting through to me and she is getting what she wants.

Did you know almost all new LBH's say this, too? I want you to remember something. Your WAW won't think like you suspect she does. You know how different men and women are even under normal conditions, so you can't imagine how different a WAW thinks & feels. You could think just the opposite thought and get closer to what's in her head.

My 180's have been noticed. What now?

Notice in a positive way, or has she said? Some women feel it's too little too late. But I think the majority of WAW'S see it as a gimmic to win her back. Most do not trust the changes to stick. Some don't care. Some get angry it took this to wake the man up. I know right now all you can think about is getting her back. Hard fact is......your changes may not be enough for her. But the sooner you realize DBing is more about changing yourself in order to be the very best man you can possibly become.......the sooner you will get stronger, calmer, focused, and start healing.

I can continue and will, this is for me. However, the detachment only means tomorrow in therapy she will have a BD on her. See?

Not really. She will have a bomb dropped on her? How or what?