Hi Wonka, These aren't inherited family heirlooms. These are things that we purchased from her grand mothers estate sale several years ago. Yes, they belonged to her GM but her GM and GF bought most of it after the war. They haven't been in the family for generations. If we hadn't bought this stuff, strangers would have as it was all up for sale. Anything that was given to us by her family I'm letting her have, no question. The best furniture and art we have was purchased at that estate sale. I told her I would give it my kids or grandkids if that is what she wants but she said that she "knows" how women are and once I'm remarried some woman will just keep it or sell it or give it to her family. The thing is, I can't talk to my L until Monday and she wants to come tomorrow! I swear this is her plan! Never give me time to stop her when she knows she is getting over on me.
As for the other stuff, she can take the book shelves and such but I don't want her doing that until we negotiate the final D degree. She wants ALL the stuff from her GM's estate sale, she can give up something else. She just wants to come through this without giving up anything she wants and I feel like that's what I've been doing.
Not only that my D19 is going to live with her BF because we can't help her with a car and she can't get a job without one (we live in the bonnies) and he lives in town close to places she can work, can take bus, etc. D19 told me she doesn't want to live with her BF but doesn't know what else to do. She also thinks her mother isn't upset because if D19 doesn't live with her mom, her mom doesn't want her to live with ME as she is jealous and not liking that she is close to me but not her mom.
I don't think it's unreasonable to ask her not to come and take anything yet and to give me more notice before she makes plans and comes over to take anything. This isn't her home anymore. She thinks it still is but her home belongs only to her. In the degree it states she can't remove any property without the courts consent. I think it's reasonable for me to ask her to wait until I talk to my lawyer. Don't you think?
