Hi Everyone, I need your help! W called last night to ask if she can come over and clean out some stuff from my D14's room for yard sale D14 and her grandmother is having. I said that would be fine. She gets here and tells me she is coming back tomorrow to take "her" furniture. The stuff from her grandmothers estate sale and some other. When I told her I wanted some of it she freaked. When I said I would make sure it goes to the kids or grandkids when I die, she said no, I know women and when you get remarried, she will keep it! What the heck? She then said "There's "right", then there's "morally right" and my keeping her GM's stuff is "morally wrong". Here is the woman who is leaving for no reason, destroying her family and is telling me what is moral? Not only that she did this front of both the kids! I told her that I don't want her coming back tomorrow, it's too soon and not enough notice. She said them how much better I have it then "most men in a D", that her male boss had no furniture because his wife took it all, she has nothing, I have everything, on and on.
I want to tell her no, she can't come tomorrow. That she can make a list and send it to my lawyer and we'll send back what is acceptable. It will mean a big fight, bad feelings, it will take place in front of the kids and make this whole process a lot harder going down the road. Do I let her do this as the "stuff" doesn't really mean much to me but I also want time to go through and get my stuff out of the book shelves that she wants, etc. She has no right to tell me when she is coming nor tell me what is "morally right" since she has no morals of her own. I just don't want to make things worse. I can't be sure if part of why I'm so angry about her taking all the stuff that we spent over $5,000 on is because I'm so angry about what she is doing, or because of other reasons.
My D19 wants me to tell her not to come tomorrow. That she is being unreasonable and start playing hardball with my W. Tell her to make a list of what is left here that she wants and send it to my lawyer and we will come to an agreement through our lawyers about what is "Right", morally or otherwise. I do that and I can be certain that the D will be speeding up and there will be a lot more animosity. If I don't, I may find myself wishing I had fought for more of what I did want and DESERVE.
What do you all think I should do? I would like some advice before I go off half cocked because I'm angry. Time is a factor. For her to say "If you take that stuff, I'll never see it again" is running through my head and ticking me off.
