2S2Q, good to hear from you! Love to hear the positive developments in your sitch.

Do you want your W back?

I have always thought that it would be hard to R after DBing, because it isn't sustainable to put your feelings into a box and stuff it in the back of the closet. Yet I think that oftentimes, the WAS enjoys having all the focus on him/her (and the blame on the LBS), and that is what lures them back in.

If you feel like you have been over and over this stuff, you have validated her, and you have acknowledged your responsibility for the problems you had, perhaps you can gently tell her that you would prefer to focus on the positive - what you have learned, how things can be different, how you can have a better R going forward.

2S2Q, does she have work to do? Do you need her to do it in order to move forward with her? What do YOU need from her in order to have a successful R with her?

me: 44 XH: 42
M 11 years
D10 and S8
Bomb drop 9/27/13
D final 7/1/14