WAW having an A but she denies it #2

[shodan]

First tune that I will learn..i will be happy if i can learn a few chords. I love music, all kinds. But have no musical ability. But I am going to try.

As I read through these comments, and some of Starsky's thread (lot to read still), I do believe in the hard boundary. We cannot work on our R if my W has a OM. Her heart figuratively and literally won't be in it. I know she saw the changes in me. She commented "I feel like I am married to a stranger" and "this guy (pointing to me) is a lot of fun." She even said "all I wanted was 10% of this not 100%." But she then backed most of those comments with "I have nothing left, my feelings have changed." The PA is what is preventing her from opening her heart and working on our M. That needs to end. How will it end? When she decides to end it. When will that be? Who knows...maybe when she realizes how great her family is. But I do know that the more time she spends in NYC, the harder this will be to address.

So how do I continue to show her what she is missing? Be super fun around my kids. But where I struggle is what I can do with/to/around her? I did a lot of great things for during the past six weeks. Was that enough time to show her the "new me"? Over the past six weeks, I have put a small flower on her bedside table that I refresh every few days, bought her different bottles of wine that she has mentioned that she likes, made her some great dinners at home (and for the kids of course), brought her coffee every morning, bought her magazines from the store, and have spent a ton of time talking and connecting. Does all of that end? I think so. But any reinforcements on that point are appreciated.