Ox, you should really, really listen to GabbysMom. You are on the wrong track.
Totally agree. In all my time on these boards (which is a LOT), I don't think I've ever seen another poster combine so much PASSIVITY with yet so much AGGRESSIVENESS. Ox is neither laying any strong boundaries, nor is he leaving his wife alone, either. He allows her to continue her affair, with near-cuckold status for himself, all the while picking at her with "how's your boyfriend" "did you kiss him?" "did you sleep with him?"-type jabs.
Absolutely, positively the WORST hybrid approach you can do, in my opinion. As much as I'm not a big fan of the totally-soft (what I call "Bo-Peep") approach of just waiting out affairs while working on yourself, it would be far better for him to do even THAT than what he's currently doing.
Starsky
Starsky
I did not say I was going to do it. It's just that she has said he is just a good friend and that she can't break all ties because she does not want to hurt him.
Enough about OM and WW.
I think the reason I have been so passive with the affair is directly related to what you say in the second part of your message about the way I act towards her. That is the issue For some reason with my wife I have always been two guys at once.
Since I am really trying to stop that and as 25 has said I am a lot better than I was I DONT want to come off as this Out-of control lunatic that packs up his wife's stuff and leaves it on the driveway .
Plus we are equal on the mortgage everything except my family trust inheritance is split 50/50 I was told that it is 99% impossible to get her out of the house, The only choice is to make her so uncomfortable she leaves...well what good does that do then I am the bad guy----AGAIN.
