I'm glad you've found time to read the books. I only read them and refer to them when H is out of town, otherwise they're tucked away where prying eyes can't see them. So - I get it! This forum is also a great resource!
I think you've made good goals, but I wouldn't get too many hopes up for couples therapy. It may be great for you, but if she's not invested in it, it may not be worth your time right now. Individual counseling is maybe more important. Just my .02.
