Thank you Sandi, Lisa, Starsky, and rec. I know I jumped back in too fast. But I'm in now and I will be aware. So as planned, I had a R talk with her today about her communicating with OM. She did get angry that I brought it up, but she needed to know my boundaries and I laid it out. She still did not admit to talking or seeing OM. She saud to me that this conversation has pushed her back from lasr night when she made a step towards us. I told her, i thought about that before this conversation and i knew that she may feel like this BUT it's that important to me that pushing her away is worth the risk. In addition, I told her what I needed to say is something that I will not put up with and it's just plain and simple respect. If she does continue to have interactions with OM and If she is playing me, I will find out by phone records and shove it in her face(not literally) and I will be done for good. I do feel good I laid my boundaries down. It's up to her now on how she respects it. Respect me. Her actions have definitely been more friendly. She's texting me more as well as calling. It feels good, but I do know that it could be fake. I decided to handle it in a neutral way for now, just to see how far and how much this new change in her will go. In the meantime, I continue to strengthen myself for whatever happens. Sometimes I feel great that its a change on how things were and sometimes I feel angry that it could not be real.
Sandi, I love how you are right to the point. As for me being a pleaser, no not anymore. I've grown from that and realize fr what you told me before about this. Just going to be calm and neutral in my ways now. Continue to get a life and build strength in myself.
As for hope in my M, I don't think about it much as before. I realize it's because of all the pain from the A and lies. In a way, this helped me find my self confidence.
