WAW having an A but she denies it

[shodan]

Thanks Theoden. I agree that one concern that I have is that they rekindle some lost love. He treated her poorly when they date and cheated on her all of the time, but she stayed with him for 12+ months. But you are right, I need to know what I want (besides not divorcing). I want to be happy and be a great father to my kids. I want her involved in the kids' lives and would be good with joint physical custody if she lives nearby.

I think this weekend, she likely will say she wants to separate and get her space. She will deny the A. My only hope that she won't move to NYC is that she loves our kids and will not want to see them every other weekend. I know she loves our kids. But she will be upset with me for not moving there (after saying I would, but that was before I learned about the A). That is no reason for her to stay in our marriage. She needs to want to stay in our marriage not because she cannot make her A work from a distance.