his words are said to extract himself while trying not to hurt your feelings, and to throw you a bone because after 2 years you're obviously still hurt and desperate, and try to get you to move on already <-- all typical guy behavior.
his actions are what he really means.
Thank you for posting this today. This ^^^^^^^^^^ is so painful to face, but soooooo important in terms of self-preservation.
...Such a painful reality when you are on the receiving end and receiving the bones. You're heart is breaking and, if you feel defined by that person/your relationship AND you have some misguided sense that he is your key to surviving in this world...it's so easy to fall into the trap of analyzing each and every word/action/breathe/inhale/exhale, etc...
We all come into this world alone. We can never truly know another human being's heart completely. We just can't. That's not how love works. We must take some leap of faith when we love another...BUT, we also must accept the reality they present to us. Waiting, waiting, waiting for someone else to see how valuable we are...isn't living at all. It's putting off our own life's purpose for a dream.
MM, imagine if you put ALL this energy that you spend on analyzing him...INTO YOU. Imagine what you could do!
When I was young and married, I spent years trying to fix my spouse's myriad of problems. It was quite the diversion from my own. I wanted to WILL him to BE the person I KNEW he could be. He showed skill/intelligence in the field of biology and loved wolves...so, what did I do? I contacted one of the world's premier wolf experts and got him to give ME free career advice for my spouse. I contacted a celebrity in the field of nature documentaries and got him to sign and send a special edition poster of himself.
I used my energies to create/fix someone else's life...not mine. Imagine where I would be if I had used all that time and energy on ME.
I'll still get there...just much later than it coulda been.
"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man
“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
