My confusing story

[Atsbaby]

Thanks ss06.

I'm feeling sad that I don't get to talk or see that side of the family. MIL is pro marriage and last I talked with her she said she was praying for a miracle.

I'm struggling to detach. I did good over the weekend, and really enjoyed that he wasnt happy with me not being my "normal self."

I think because I see him everyday and I'm struggling to get away, because of the kids. S10 has football practice 3 nights a week. I take him and H meets us there, but then comes to our house for an hour or so before going wherever.

Last night, at practice he would joke with me and talk to me about the practice (football is his life, which is part of our problem), but he did struggle at times with eye contact. Side note: I set up a boundary that if he was to have a conversation with me then we had to have eye contact...this was before I found db and realized the shame or guilt he was feeling. H even used my nickname when he talked with me, which I was taking as a good sign, another baby step.

When we got to the cars, I asked if he was coming back to the house to have dinner with us and he said he would come back to the house, but he had a big lunch (lost eye contact, so he lied). Whatever...

When I got home, I quickly ate and then left to take the dog for a walk. When I got back, unfortunately H was curled on the couch with D. He stayed for another 15 minutes, but I tried to avoid him.

Tonight, when we got to practice, I sat away from him around other parents. I tried to ignore him and not look at him. S got injured and H talked to me a few times. Then once again he came home with us. I made dinner and let him talk about football. Then when I finished eating I jumped in the shower. H knocked on bathroom door as soon as I came out of the shower, and then appeared 5 minutes later to tell me about his dad (which is whole other story, but probably the cause of the MLC).

I'm wondering though if H is suffering from MLC. H meets a lot of the criteria and I've been reading on the MLC board, which a lot sounds like him, but lately he hasn't been in the fog, or so it seems. I'm just tired of feeling so confused and lost with him. I know I need to GAL but my schedule currently is making it hard, plus it have the kids ALL the time.

I know, continue to read DR and create a plan for me to enjoy my life...easier said than done!