Yes, I have a much clearer head after not talking to this man for 3 days now.
No leopards don't change their spots for sure! And he's not changing anything.
Im glad to say, I really don't miss him at all. To be honest he was becoming quite a drain on me. I feel myself regaining energy by not having his tether on me.
I went to a family reunion Saturday. This is ExH paternal side of the family. They don't speak to him due to what he did. They told me he was an embarrassment and a disappointment to the family. It was that family that gave him a very large inheritance to help us out after the shooting. And it was EX H that literally blew it all and I think sent the majority of it to OW.
At any rate, his paternal side of the family are just the nicest group you ever could meet. They're loving, supportive, no drama, no drinking, no fighting, no BS! Just happy people, happy to ge together! Well Ex H cousin's boyfriend proposed to her in front of the entire family with the approval of the parents. She's been single for 13 years, but it never stopped her from living her life! Her fiance' has been widowed over a year with two girls. The family stopped the girls and said " welcome to the family".
It was right then and there my heart open and broke all over again. It broke because these family reunions were something my Ex lived for. And for a family as loving and forgiving as this one, to basically shun him for what he did, that says alot. It's sad, yet he did it to himself. Then my heart opened again as I realized that this type of family environment is what I want! And that this dude I've been seeing for over a year, just isn't going to make the cut! It was at that point I thought that I should come home and just break it off with him because this simply isn't going where I want it to go.
Then I got home and boyfriend was behaving like a self absorbed bratt, irritated with me for not paying enough attention to him VIA TEXT MESSAGE ALL DAY, that breaking it off was easy! On top of that I loaned XB 100.00 over a month ago, and I still haven't seen one red cent. Nor will I ever.
Thank you for the support guys! I guess the first relationship after the big D, is really a learning experience. I really had hoped that I wouldn't have to look any further. But I guess in a way its a good thing. I've really changed over the last 3 years.
Yes job, I've been in rescue mode and I was paying attention to that because that can quickly turn into co dependency. However this man has really made it clear that he's using his illness as power and control, via victimization.
Yep Matt, being alone really is so much easier in so many ways. I guess I just am tired. I haven't had a vacation in a year, and have worked so many extra days and hours to help keep the place afloat because people are quitting... well Im just worn out! I think if I could just get some adequate rest and a vacation from work, I might just get my zing back!
