1 step forward, 1000 steps back - part 3

[mdu]

Feeling terribly hopeless about things. We have so much working against us now with OW in the office, my various f ups, no opportunities to see each other since the kids don't have any sports right now. I reread my prior posts and previously we connected a lot over the kids. But now, it seems like the kids are reasonably adjusted to our current sitch so we're not really even discussing them a whole lot at this point.

I opted to call H last evening since as I mentioned from rereading my prior posts it was clear some pursuit works with H. I called him to tell him about a big work development for me --- potential big opportunity. I kept it 100% about sharing my work news and did not ask at all about OW in the office and he did not volunteer anything. I got off the phone relatively quickly. He was warm and sweet so that was good. But I still sense he is really, really pulling back from me.

I will speak to DBing coach later today and see what she thinks.

I know I should pull back and not worry about the timeline but I feel a real sense of urgency because my stepson's wedding is coming right up in early October. I know H feels the need for us to be firmly on a path, on way or another, by then. I kind of feel the same, if by the wedding we have not decided to reconcile then it seems like it would be quite tough to recover from being excluded from things like family photos at this major event. I realize this also works against us because clearly we need time...and probably lots of it, especially with this latest development around OW in the office. But I'm not sure how to handle? Any thoughts?

Man, it seems suddenly we have so, so much going against us now. I just can't get over how dramatically things have turned for the worse. You think you have some measure of control over your life but in the end, you really don't. I mean obviously we can't control OW moving here and that is really, really working against us. I know I have done things to work against us too but with OW moving here layered on top, it's just a disaster.