WOW I can not believe I just said that...what is going on,,,what is this,,,
Does this surprise you? I'm not surprised. You were hurt. Deeply. There was a run up to the hurt just as there is to an easing back down. Kind of like a bell curve (always looks like a pimple to me, but whatever, right?) The curve starts when you got hurt. You rush around like mad trying to fix things. And then as they start to get better, you revisit the pain and it becomes the most critical part of the whole thing.
It's why we always say that when/if the MLCr wants to come back, it's really up to us, the LBS.
Put another way, a R is like two people on a teeter totter. During this dance, one moves one way, and the other moves to compensate for it to maintain a sort of balance.
The trick is to figure out what it was you wanted and want. And then break the dynamic.
There were some posters that posted about this kind of stuff and really illustrated the whole thing. You two are both going to hide behind the wall of protection. Who's going to come out from behind it first? That's really the question.
I think it was Raine that really illustrated the process of her H coming back to the relationship. You should have a read of that.
If you don't, you'll eventually wonder what if? You owe it to yourself to gain some perspective and see what the other side might look like.
You've been hurt. So has he. I'm not surprised you feel like this, if that helps
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
