So, after my set back of begging and pleading despite everything I know, I'm standing again and following LRT. He came home from his "meditation" stay at that pricey hotel to find D6 and I watching a movie on the couch (something we don't often do). He asked to join us and it was a lovely evening. I went to bed early but he wanted to talk about what he thought about in his over-priced hotel. He's decided to move out but "thinks" he can forgo filing official separation docs (had no idea this existed) and would consider seeing a therapist with me to either help me come to terms with the divorce that he wants or to say something uber enlightening to him to make him want to stay. No pressure on that marriage therapist, huh? I've inquired about a two day intensive with Michelle but wow, it's pricey. Cheaper than a divorce for sure but not cheap if we get the divorce anyway. Maybe the phone coaching will be enough? I just don't know.
Anyway, back to my LRT...
I was energetic and responsive but not fake or sarcastic or belittling (big for me!). I listened and validated but ended the convo every time. I'm kind and attentive but not needy or pushy or hovering at all. I'm treating him like I would a friendly room mate. Respectfully but with no obligations. After this 180 on my part and our talk last night about him moving out and considering therapy, etc., he came knocking on my door and very intensely asked if I had something to tell him because I was acting very differently compared to Friday and it made him very curious. I simply said, "I'm taking this time to think, that's all." He asked me if I was sure (what does he think???) I had nothing to tell him. I confirmed that I didn't and that I am just taking time to think, much like he is. He's flummoxed and I'm glad. I'm trying to fill my schedule up like crazy because spending time with friends is really helpful, whether they know my current sitch or not. I'm looking at flights to spend some time with my BFF who just had her first child. I've applied for 10 jobs (in the public sector which makes it hard because the recruitment processes for public sector positions are looooooong). I'm reading, looking into modern script and calligraphy classes and watching sunsets nightly. In short, I'm GAL!! I hear Gloria Gaynor off in the distance reminding me that I WILL SURVIVE!!
