One thing that she's reiterated to me numerous times:

I keep going back and forth between indicating to her that I'm ready to let go, and indicating to her that I want her back.

She's said that she's extremely frustrated by my back & forth and it is emotionally stressing her out. I can understand how it can be unfair to her for me to be giving mixed signals. I think it's just my emotions coming out. On the surface, I want to show her that I'm letting go. Deep down, I want her back. Those two forces are battling each other inside of me every day.

I need to learn how to detach and truly show her that I'm ready to move on. It is clear that pursuit is not the way to her heart. I need to give her space and time. I totally get that. It's just really REALLY hard. I hope to find strength to continually improve on this. So far, I haven't even made it a full week without changing my stance. Unfair to her. Unfair to me.

M: 15 years
BD: 6/25/14
EA/PA: starts 5/14/14
11/30/14 - A ends
5/15/15 - D is finalized.
11/28/15 - Start of new LTR with a wonderful woman (and still going strong)!