Well...it is done. It went so quickly. My two father-in-laws were there with WAW, I was alone. Afterward there were hugs from everyone. I was told by WAW's Dad "I am not your enemy" and I was told by her Step-Dad that he loves me. My ex-WAW and I hugged for a moment, I kissed her on the cheek and wished her the best and walked away. It was tough...but all of this is finally over now. All the months of posting here, receiving replies from you wonderful people, culminates in today. I am divorced.
I can't tell you how much I wanted to object when the Judge asked if we were sure there was no hope for reconciliation but I didn't. My in-laws know how much I loved my ex-WAW and they know I didn't want this so there was no animosity whatsoever. Her Dad hugged me twice in fact. Just a sad and tragic day in my life...and I failed to save my marriage in spite of my best efforts. Now it is done.
I want to thank you all for all the advice, comments, and uplifting posts over my 3-part story here. You are all great people and I hope you all have a better end result than I did. My best to you all and I will keep you posted in the slim chance there's anything significant to report.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Thanks guys. It's been a long road but at the end of the day I know I tried everything, with my entire heart and soul to save this marriage. Now I will be haunted by what she told me a couple days ago...that part of her wants to come back. I just don't understand how she can admit that and still say she's sure this is what she wanted. I mean if it were me, and I said something like that, that seems to me to be the same thing as me saying I am still unsure. However it's water under the bridge now. I will indeed continue to post here. All I have to look forward to now is to read about others who successfully save their marriages here. In some small way that makes me feel better, that some LBS is spared this agony right at the end. Just a horrid day today but I guess it's best it's over with so I can stop fighting so hard and exhausting myself. You guys are truly great here. Thank you for all the support throughout my ordeal here. I've seen so many changes in my attitude over these last 3 months here in my posts. What a long, strange trip it's been.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
No Drew, you're right, I guess I don't have to understand...and trying to is mind reading. All there is is the future now and whatever that may bring. I wish I shared your optimistic approach. Maybe after a couple days go by I will. The wound is too fresh right now.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
I haven't posted on your sitch before but I have been reading your posts. All I would like to say is that my thoughts are with you my friend!
M 35 W 31 D 10 Married 3 years Together 11 Single since Nov 13 Moved out Dec 13 ILYBNILWY, 'I don't want to be a boring housewife, 'I don't fancy you any more' OM confirmed Jun 14
Thanks so much bashy. I appreciate it. I guess our divorce isn't technically final for another couple months because we are in some waiting period it seems called nisi. Even though the Judge granted us the divorce I guess it's still not final. At least that's the way I understand it to work here in MA. Ours was an uncontested no-fault divorce and best as I can tell that's how it works in our state. Not that I am very optimistic things will change but I guess it's not over yet after all. I thought once the Judge granted the divorce at the hearing that that was it. I will keep you all posted. Thanks again bashy.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Hi Guys, well I heard from my ex-WAW today. She was basically telling me the security deposit check hasn't come yet. She also went on to say the the "almost OM" and her are now on the outs. She said he was a liar and that she's happy she didn't take the bait. She told me she is moving to Florida in a couple months. She also remarked one of my posts on my FB page. She said she hopes we can be friends one day. So I replied to her and basically told her that I can't be friends with her because I still love her. I told her I will always think our divorce was a huge mistake and that we had something together that only happens once in a lifetime if ever. I told her that as long as I am still in love her, trying to forge a friendship would be living a lie. I told her this was all a huge mistake and I will always believe that...that she gave up on our marriage far to easily and far too quickly. I haven't heard back from her yet but I figured the whole not pursuing thing is water under the bridge at this point since it didn't prevent my divorce so at this point I don't care that I "pursued" with me reply. I was honest with her because at this point what have I got to lose, we're already divorced anyway. I will keep you all updated but I spilled my feelings to her...I have nothing to lose at this point by doing so.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
