afraid I have waited too long #3

[nit84]

Feeling a bit strange.

Yesterday It rained a lot so there wasn't much I could in the way of yard work or GALing. I stayed around the house watching movies doing laundry and reading. I did go out once to pick up some needed things at the market.

My W was also home most of the day only going to the gym for about 3 hrs which is abnormal she normally is gone 5 to 6 hrs on a Saturday.

I remained downstairs and she was upstairs with her bedroom door shut the whole day. When she did come out I asked a couple questions and she answered them and I went about my business.

I know DB is counter-intuitive but it felt like maybe I should have knocked on the bedroom door and asked W if she wanted to watch TV or something, not necessarily with me even, W return cable box from our bedroom the day of the hearing 3 weeks ago so she wouldn' t have to pay a % of the cable bill.

This is the longest we have been in the house together in about 6 months I hope I didn't miss a chance to fill her love tank somehow even if just a little.

Since our last R talk two weeks ago I have pretty much gone back to detaching as much as possible and I am ok with how I have handled it.

Yesterday it was a feeling that I had to fight off realizing there was probably was nothing to be gained by trying to get my W to come out from behind a closed door.

Sometimes it just seems silly for two people who intimately know each other to walk around like two ships passing in the night. I get it, that she wants a D but to hole up in a confined space for many hours at a time can't be good for anybody.

I am not saying we need to talk about R but some idle conversation would probably be helpful for both of us.

If she is determined to remain cooped up I don't understand why she is still living under the same roof with me.

She has the court order providing her support from me so what is stopping her? The least she could be doing is making it seem like she is moving.

I am not sure how I would feel is she did move out but I know I wouldn't try to stop her.

I don't think she is waiting for me to ask or beg her not to go but then again she told me that it upset her that I only have told her I loved her once in the year since we S and that was after the support hearing while we were discussing the A possibility.

I feel if anything I would like to ask for her to read 5LL it seems like it would be the least clingy, needy, or pursuing book to ask her to take a look at but I'm not sure.

comments, 2 x 4's, advice all welcomed.