one day at a time

[25yearsmlc]

The family friend never charged us anything. My issue is that I don't want Lillian wondering why there are so many professional photos of the twins but not her. Right now it's no big deal but when she is older I don't want her to feel cheated or that she wasn't as important as the twins.


Well no offense but I think you are borrowing trouble from tomorrow. Man, I'm 1 of 9 kids and I just don't do that type of measuring...yikes!

I have calmed down a lot, no one but me saw the frustration. I told H I didn't feel comfortable with her being there/coming to my home. He acted truly shocked that I thought there was something going on. He tried to assure me there has never been anything between them. I just kept telling him that it didn't matter if there was, that I wasn't concerned with who he is intimate with just as long as I don't have to feel uncomfortable in my own home.

He offered to cancel with her and hire the lady our friend suggested.

Let him.

[twinmom]

I am an only child so sibling stuff is hard for me. I don't know how to deal with it.

[Maybell]

Wow, an only child with 5 kids! You are really reaching outside your comfort zone!

I'm the oldest of four, my mom is the 7th of ten, and I have three kids. There is NO WAY you'll be able to treat them all evenly. Even if you magically could they'd still find a way to jockey for position. That's just how it is. Let it become the family joke. Lillian may complain that there are professional photos of the twins; the twins will complain that they never get you to themselves. Your oldest boys will complain that you made them responsible for everything and that they raised the little ones single handedly. You won't win, so don't try.

Enjoy your baby's baptism. Don't let all the shizzle suck the joy away from this brief time.

[twinmom]

Don't know if I am allowed to post this here or if the link will work but this video is so amazing I had to try and share.

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=583210001741169&id=100001565226312

[25yearsmlc]

Each one of our 3 kids (son and 2 daughters) feel that they were treated with less attention than the others, but that I secretly prefer them.

So I think I must have done something right...??

[twinmom]

Each one of our 3 kids (son and 2 daughters) feel that they were treated with less attention than the others, but that I secretly prefer them.

So I think I must have done something right...??

yes, I think you did it right.

[twinmom]

Got into a tickle fight with H and the twins tonight. It's moments like these that make detaching so damn hard. Everyone laughing, rolling on the floor/jumping on each other.

[watto14]

hi twinmom, nothing to add to your sitch, but i get the whole, being and only child thing, I'm an only child, and I have a seven yr old son and 3 yr old twin boys, and because I didn't grow up around siblings, I overcompensate all the time with the boys, tring to make sure its 'fair'...

[twinmom]

Yesterday was Lillian's baptism. It was wonderful. During mass H kept putting his hands on my waist/back every time we had to stand in front with Father. I didn't make a scene in church, I sarcastically asked H if he was going to take communion and he looked down at the floor and said no. I told him he should probably go to confession first.

After Mass we were getting ready to take pictures and I looked at H and said "happy family or reality" to which he replied happy family please.
So we did pics together. (Lilly me H in some, me H and all the kids, you get the idea)

Back at my house everyone had a great time, it was relaxed and I had such a good time talking to friends/family. I made a white peach sangria that was AMAZING! I kept getting compliments on the food (I made BBQ beef, ham, potato salad, pasta salad, fruit, veggie and cheese/salami trays, cupcakes, and cookies)
One of H's brothers took a few plates of food home and told H he was so lucky to have a wife that could cook, he told me that he looks forward to holidays because he knows I will be doing the cooking.

It was a huge ego boost and put me in an even better mood.

I let the kids open new Nerf guns and lots of darts after most people left. S8 BFF and his family were there and the mom had errands to run after the party so I said the friend could stay for the rest of the day. H and I joined in on the Nerf war with the twins and older kids. Again, lots of laughter and a good time.

So today I am spending the morning reminding myself that yesterday wasn't really my life and getting back on the detaching path.

[twinmom]

Yesterday was rough. Overwhelming morning and dentist appointment for me and the twins in the afternoon.

It was emotionally just a really rough day. I sent H a text and asked him to PLEASE not be at the house this evening. He asked why and I told him I had a very rough day and needed to relax and him being there judging me would push me over the edge.

Typical for H he didn't listen so I took Lilly shopping and H kept the twins. When I came home I went into my room, H came in there and wanted to talk. He listened to why I had a rough day, tried to hug me (I pulled away) and then went to the couch.



Why is H now doing all the things I wanted but didn't get during our M???? He leaves work at a decent time, he listens/asks about stressful days without trying to "fix" it and he is pursuing me sexually (I still turn him down every time) he also has offered to talk to his mom when a situation came up where I was unhappy that she gave them chips for lunch/didn't put them down for a nap and fed them a snack right before I made dinner.

Ugh, it's like rubbing my face in what I "want" in a husband but can't have (and yea the whole cheating thing is a huge deal breaker.