WAH with OW/EA - advice wanted! :)

[LisaB]

Hi GG, Ben and Georgiabelle, Thanks for your replies!

Sounds like the three of you have pretty much summed up what I thought myself. Who knows what he is thinking or why he says things?!? I sure don't and I'm not sure even he does.

Georgiabelle, you are right that he did check out of the R before his announcement. But it sure seemed to happen fast and in hindsight be heavily influenced by sudden attention from the OW. I'm not sure if he was just looking for a way out or if it was sudden to him too. He did say many times that he wasn't sure what he wants and didn't know what would happen, but he never said he wanted to split up. Maybe he is just a chickensh!t!

Ben, I like that you are such an optimist. I'm so glad for you that things are going well! Thank you for checking in with me here and for your good wishes.

I think his whole "friendship" thing is a cover up for other thoughts and feelings. We are NOT friends. I guess that is why I wondered his reason for saying it to everyone. I think he doesn't want to look like a bad guy or FEEL like a bad guy! So he tells himself all is great and we are friends. Not admitting to himself what he is doing to his so called previous "best friend". Probably a bunch of other things mixed up in there.

I don't know when we will meet up. I told him I have a very busy week this week, so next week is better for me. He said ok and we did not discuss it further. I think I will leave it up to him to ask again.

On the other hand he has now been contacting me daily with little random messages about trivial things. Not loving or romantic in any way at all. Friendly, I guess. But every day. I never contact him first. That was one of the problems in our R, I was too available, too "nice".

Sorry for the long ramble. Hope everyone is doing well and has a nice weekend!
Hugs, Lisa