ok, so today is a new day, last night I let myself cry, howl, feel sorry for myself, got angry with h and ow(swore a lot, good thing I was home by myself!)
this morning, I got up, told the universe what I want, had shower, curled my hair(because I can, because the boys aren't here to distract me!)
I put my big girl boots on, put music on really loud- I love P!nk I got in my car, went to h house to pick up the twins for day care, I was cheerful, upbeat, and swinging my curls. tried not to backslide as h seemed to be in and mood(follow on from his mood last night. mmmm, maybe it throws him off when Im not cranky??
dropped the boys off at day care, got myself a hot chocolate, rang h to let him know what is happening today at day care, asked him if we were alright(I know hit me with the 2x4 now) he said of course, its just the boys being the boys stressing him out, validated(I completely understand-they are crazy!!) hung up and then to get myself out of my own headspace, I rang up my best friend.
I ordered stock so I can work this afternoon, I'm looking at a house today before I start work, so all positive there, had to let h know about house as he is paying a portion of the rent, he said they're nice houses, he's seen the inside of a couple of them, felt like he's pushing me to move into something, feel like he's constantly pushing, but i'm letting that go through to the keeper for now.
I can do this, I am going to take each day as it comes, I am going to be the woman any man would be a fool to leave
