I read your story. Ouch. It sounds to me (and when I read a post like yours I usually jump and and point it out) like your wife is involved in an affair. The way that her emotions switched off for you and her speed to leave would make sense if you had been abusing her for the last many years, but you didn't. In fact, you were simply guilty of not having the best marriage skills- like most of us on here. You loved your wife, took care of each other, and made a few common mistakes. None of that is reason for her to leave.
However, if you wife has met someone else, that changes everything. Her feelings for that other person will become more important to her than your decade together. She will become addicted to that new relationship, no matter how it tears her life apart. Much of what your wife has said is script from other Wayward wives on here. expect that your wife will start to rewrite the history of your M, highliting all of the times that you hurt her. This is also what she will tell her family and friends as she does not what them to think that she was the bad guy when she suddenly introduces them to the new beau in her life.
Many of us here didn't think that our wives could cheat or lie- but many of them have or are. In fact, your W may not have thought that she was the type to cheat until she started to fall for someone close to her. Everyone is capable of it, no matter how upstanding they may be.
I could be wrong- I'm simply posting my thoughts here. Ultimately, you will have to be able to meet your wife's emotional needs to win her back, but that won't be easy if she lives elsewhere. If there's someone else in the picture, that A will have to die a natural death, most likely, before she will return to you.
