FINALLY SURFACING

[Fartiltre]

Great today at beach with two friends and their children.
Bathing, playing, barbecue – it all!

When we left for home W was at friend drinking coffee with his wife. Ds were very happy to see her and they didn’t want to leave her. Especially D5 was sad and crying. Goodbye lasted for 15 min or more with tears all over.
I stayed out of it and let W handle it.

D4 was very sad in the car. D7 fell asleep quickly.

45 min later I received a text:
W:
“Are the girls ok?”

Me:
“Almost.
Will you give me a warning by text or call next time a situation like today can occur? Maybe we can avoid it entirely.
See you Sunday. Will 11AM do for you?
Have a nice evening :-)”

W:
“How is that – we could as easily have run into each other at the supermarket. I agree that it is so sad and hurtful. I didn’t stop crying until now myself :-(
11AM is fine. Say hi many times and enjoy the weekend.”

Me:
“We can’t do anything about the supermarket and likewise – I agree totally – but when I am at beach with [friend] there is a good chance that we will have coffee afterwards at his place. I assume you know we were at the beach ;-) If I had known you were at [Friends wife] having coffee I would not have stopped by. I am not mad or likewise. I just want to avoid that especially the girls but also you and me gets sad when it can be avoided. We can take it on the phone if you think it needs to be talked over.
Great about Sunday :-)”

W:
“Neither [Friends wife] or I thought about it. So if a situation like this happens again I will let you know”


D7 and I bought a tent yesterday and we will be camping in the garden tonight – that took of the tension and D5s thoughts about W.
She was speaking about missing, asking why W and I are not living together for some hours but when we rolled out the sleeping bags in the tent she got better.


I have some issues that need to be addressed:
W asked for the evaluation /how are Ds and we doing – talk
I am doubtful if I should take the next step towards this or just leave W with it

We need to talk about the days where one of us picks the Ds up and set them of later because of a special thing like Legoland or a family party. To me this is not the best at present time – It hurts them more than it does them good.

We need to long term plan and I need to confirm it in writing – I need my calendar sorted out and W (or I) seem to forget some agreements.

We need to find a solution to D7s wish about staying half time with me.


Tomorrow we stay at home and in the afternoon I have arranged a playing date for the Ds for two hours. I am going to try out the distance for the competition on august 2.
Saturday will be a strange day. Last day of vacation with the children.