Thanks Dev. I have a plan. I can see two outcomes.
One is a lot of work, and I don't know if it ever turns out well for anyone, but I signed up for it and I think it has the best chance. Like yours, W has a long, long way to go (and I'm not denying any guilt here), and I know about a lot of dirty laundry (literally and figuratively) that I'd have to get over.
The other one is a lot of work. It will work out for me, since it will be up to only me to make it so, but it will suck for kids.
Next time I'm out in the couve, I'm buying. Wingman?
