"I guess I need to learn to let go. "

That's actually all you've been doing. You don't even have a co-parenting relationship with your W. That is something that you should (at the very least) try to establish.

M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER