1 step forward, 1000 steps back

[mdu]

"It looks like H has already addressed this part and is forthcoming with you on this particular request. Do you feel this is the case?"

Yes, this was from our discussion last week but I wanted to include it just to be 100% sure we agree and there's no misunderstanding.

"Totally transparency regarding your whereabouts and who you are with

Can you please explain your reasoning behind this request? "

I feel I should know who he's spending time with especially if it's female colleagues. I didn't realize how much I did NOT know previously. Maybe I should rephrase it though because it's not like I'm asking for a daily/hourly calendar but rather if I ask, I expect totally honest answers.

"• Total transparency with all electronic communications including:
o List of all contacts in your phone and who they are
o List of all communication apps on phone and computer (facebook, snapchat, email, etc) and all passwords
o Freedom to review your phone or computer and anything on it at any time

What is the plan here? How often do you plan to check them? For how long? At some point you will need to let go of them and begin to trust H. It would not bode well for the M if H feels that you're constantly breathing down his neck."

The A was carried out primarily electronically so this is a big one to me. I would offer him all of my info if he wanted so don't feel I am asking for anything I wouldn't do myself. I don't like secrets in a M and felt that way even pre-A. I don't plan to check with specific regularity but I want access so that if I start getting that yucky gut feel that something is off I have the freedom to verify. I assume I will stop checking when I start to feel more confident and safe in the M, I don't think there's a specific timeline.