A: I understand, right now I feel to let him go, do you thing - CHEAT! If that is what he needs to express MLC, then get it out. It's the callous using that occupies my foreground. It's affecting me & I am fighting to look past to see the whole picture. What is necessary now for good later. Maybe when he finds someone, I'll feel threatened(!!). But right now, I feel used - big time.
Yep, I get that. I felt more dis-ease at the lying than the cheating if I'm honest about it. The sheer anger has been discomforting as well.
Basically, it becomes a tiered system of hurts, if you will. The only remarkable thing is that I figured the cheating was going to be the big momma of 'em all.
I also get the feeling of being trapped between your child and his father's whackiness/meanness. Been there and done that with my ex. It was hard at first to understand how she could lie/cheat/walk away from us all and then turn around and blame me for her actions.
In hindsight, I don't know that it could have been done any other way. It kind of makes sense if you stop and think it through but only in hindsight.
It's crazy. It's hurtful. It's going to continue unless and until you are able to detach and change yourself. He's not going to for a very long time, if ever.
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
