Old dog seeks new trick

[Eatsma]

Haha....I have a whole bunch of songs that invade my head space.

We Don't Talk Anymore by Cliff Richard was bouncing around my head this morning. THAT won't help you either!

Gangnam Style? Okay....

I should pull out my old marathon training songs...They're all inspirational, "You can get through the hard stuff!" kinds of songs. Like Running Down a Dream.....

[Old Dog]

Right, I've been meaning to do this for a while. Here's a short list of inspirational songs I thought of.

I hope people will add to it: and if you have an associated story, please recount that as well.

I can see clearly now - Johnny Nash
There's always music - United State of Electronica (U.S.E)
I am woman - Helen Reddy
I will survive - Gloria Gaynor
Walk tall - Johnny Cash
Lust for life - Iggy Pop
Goodbye misery - Jesse Garon & the Deseradoes (I don't expect anyone else to know this btw)

[Old Dog]

Suggested by rayzzz

Life is a highway - Tom Cochrane (ol skool Canadian singer)
Alive - Pearl Jam! (I know its not bout his divorced wife but it is bout surviving loss)

as was Lust for Life - Iggy Pop

[Old Dog]

These are some of the many things that I love, admire and appreciate about my wife.

She is highly motivated with passion and ‘oomph’. When she sets her mind to something, she is able to concentrate and get it done. She can be quite fiery and brave at times and a protective mother to our children. These things are mainly directed inward or within our family, but she has a stable base to be able to do that safely.

I think some of this has been lost in the last few years due to my working away from home and her tiredness, but has been partly rejuvenated by getting a new job which she is enjoying. It may have brought about enough confidence to bring about bomb day. Of course this is just my interpretation so it may be completely wrong.

She is a good, honest person. She is intelligent, clever and has bags of common sense. She is classy, fit and pretty, and wears minimal makeup and I love her mad hair first thing in the morning.

She makes me and the children laugh with her rudeness sometimes, and the way she makes up silly sayings and songs - the children (and the cat) have so many weird made-up pet names it isn’t true. She cackles and squarks wonderfully at jokes and silly things and laughs at my daftness and most of my jokes.

I had always believed that I wouldn’t be able to have a special relationship with someone as I felt I was different to everyone else and I never really wanted to get married: it’s just a piece of paper after all. But what I want most in the world is to rekindle our marriage: I am so proud that she married me and will do my utmost to turn my life around and be the man she would be a fool to leave.

[Wet]

Hi odsnt, it is interesting that you put together a list of what you love admire, and adore about your W. Why did you decide to put this together now?

OK, your song list is great, and this should be a separate topic. But here are a few more inspirational songs:

Switching to Glide-The Kings;
What a Wonderful World-Louis Armstrong;
Bright Side of the Road-Van Morrison;
Walking on Sunshine-Katrina and the Waves;
Favourite Shirts-Haircut 100 (the most joy-filled song I have heard);
Lunatic Fringe-Red Rider (OK, not an inspirational song, just something for us to remember what we are going through.)

There is something about music that heals the soul. Thanks for sharing your songs.

[Old Dog]

Hi Wet, thanks for your tunes, I'll have to check out The Kings and Red Rider. And you're right, music does heal the soul. Maybe I should start another music thread.

I was inspired to by Mat who has done the same although I did post something similar much earlier on in my thread in answer to MrBond.

I am also going to compile a goals list and a 180s list so watch this space.

[Old Dog]

Up with the lark again, so I thought I'd type this out. When I went to see my counsellor last week and asked for help setting goals, she produce a P.A.C.E.R sheet which I have copied out below. It was initially for business use, but can also be useful for the likes of us.

Positive
What do you want? (Stated in the positive) - Get rid of fear and perceived personal rejection, courage, will power, safety

Achievement
How would you know that you had it? - I will be able to do things that I want to do.
What would you see, feel and hear? - I would see, feel and hear people taking more notice of me.
How would someone else know that you had it? - People would tell me.

Context
When do you want it? - All the time.
When don’t you want it? - In cases of danger.
With whom? Where? - Anyone, anywhere.

Ecology
Positive by-products, i.e.implications.
What would happen if you got it? - I would be able to take a more active role at work, with my family and friends.
If you get it would you lose anything? - I would lose baggage.
is it representative of who you are and where you want to be with persuading and influence? - Yes

Resources
Can you initiate it and maintain it? - Yes, I am working on it.
Is it in your control? - Yes, nobody else can do it for me.
What do you need to achieve it? - A positive mental attitude.
What is the time scale? - Three months to achieve conscious competence*. i think I am passing from level 2 & 3 now.
What are the evaluation points? - My sense of well-being, others perception of me.
How committed are you? - Very. I have to do this for myself.

* The four stages of competence are: unconscious incompetence, conscious incompetence, unconscious competence and conscious competence

[Eatsma]

That's a good sheet. I could use it! Thanks for sharing!

[Old Dog]

You're most welcome.

[Old Dog]

Some 180s

My biggest 180 is refusing to let past behavioural traits get me down. I am trying my level best to keep my positive mental attitude alive all the time. Before I would hunker down and just wait for the bad times to pass.

I am walking tall with my head held high, shoulders back, chest out and walking briskly instead of ambling along.

Every Wednesday is my ’happy shirt day’ at work, I actually started it before bomb day, but I’m continuing with it and my coworkers seem seem to enjoy it. I have also bought two pairs of nice jeans and a cool shirt: I have need been into clothes/fashion - what’s wrong with black? I’m back shaving every day instead of every few days, I got my hair cut shorter than usual, I’m trying to look good.

If someone asks me how I am, I’ve taken to saying ‘all good, nothing bad’ which I’ve borrowed from UK DJ Danny Baker - I love his show, he is a self professed Pollyanna. It’s quite amusing for people who know my situation but also a very positive statement by those who don’t.

I’ve read: DB, DR, David Millar’s autobiography (cyclist who succumbed to drugs and fought back)
I’m currently reading: MAFMWAFV
And lined up I’ve got: The 5 love languages, Feel the fear and do it anyway, How to change your life and everyone in it

I’m listen to Oli Doyle’s Mindfullness podcast when I need it.

I am keeping busy when at home doing numerous chores: washing, ironing, gardening, fixing stuff, mending bikes, taking rubbish to the tip. If something needs doing, I am just doing it.

I have made food for the kids and family spontaneously and without grumbling. This is a big thing for me: I am so bad at cooking and even thinking of things to cook, plus I’m a vegetarian and the rest of the family aren’t.

I have stopped comfort eating and in general eat far less the before. I seem to have lost my appetite for some reason. I have lost 9.5kg / 1.5 stones / 21lbs.