I'd like to chime in on the forgiveness idea here. It is always an ongoing process. Not one where you say, "I forgive you" then hook up your little fingers and pinky swear on it!
In my case, it took me about 9 years for true forgiveness to sink in every cell within my body. My actions, words, and thoughts are now all aligned. I think that vibe shows in my latest interactions with Ms. Wonka. Sure, I've slipped and anger/resentment reared its ugly head at times whenever my thoughts strayed out in the "betrayed" territory.
Keep working at the forgiveness thing. It means you've truly let go of their hurtful actions toward you and begin to look at their good qualities instead of their mistakes. I've only begun to recall Ms. Wonka in a positive light and it shows up in my countenance.
All of this was accomplished through very hard work at being mindful of my thoughts and emotions. I had to take charge of the steering wheel --thoughts---and direct them toward a place that was positive and peaceful. Pretty tough, but it can be done!
