Wife in MLC and getting ready to leave #6

[LoisB]

I actually would feel better if my W WAS doing this "on her own". The thing is she has given up her life to her father and is doing what HE thinks is best. Even as far as him telling her where her bed needs to be in HER room.

Matt, none of them do it ALONE. I've been struggling with the fact that Smokey, as far as I know, has been living with OW for a year in the apartment I helped him with the downpayment. This is a year on top of the time he was already living with her in our neighborhood. For some reason, this has been hitting me hard...I'm imagining how many times they've had sex...now, it should be routine...How he gets in bed with her each night with the same routine he did with me for 20 years.

I know what you will say...Heather, dwelling on these facts, imagined or not, doesn't help me, does it?

Dwelling on HER insanity doesn't help you either. It stinks...plain and simple. It just does. But, it's what we have to deal with today.

Of course none of that really matters. She is doing what she is.

Bingo!!!

Yesterday she brought my D14 back home and once again, loaded up her car with all kinds of stuff that really doesn't belong to her! From the only iron we own to the ice cream maker to frozen food (beef) from the freezer!

I think it's time for some boundaries about the stuff in the house. She will continue now that she feels it's ok. Your home is not an outlet for her to come shop and remove items at her will. I'd talk to your attorney. I can't remember if you hired one? I remember you were looking...She left the marital home. She CANNOT continue to come and take things as she likes. She needs to make a list and present it to your attorney...if there's anything left. Lol.

I think you need to do this for your own dignity and self-respect. Taking action will ease the pain of her leaving.

I'm glad you went to the party and enjoyed yourself. I'm so glad you received some encouragement and support. I hope you're proud of yourself for going and holding your own. That's HUGE!!!! And, you didn't dwell on her shid. :-)