boy- wreckage is really the right word. i know - it sure is nothing i ever saw coming. I guess life is sending me a big ole message too. not only do i see it all differently- i think i'm becoming a different person. fighting negativity t ho.
i've lost important folks in my life in past few years. it gums me up- thinking maybe a lousy r for the time being is better than none at all. too much lonliness around me- watching it up close & personal & feeling it too when he's in fl. i hate it and i know THAT much.
he's being mr. really nice when he's around??!! - i'm in no place mentally or emotionally to make any big moves. I've been sayin that for three years - life's been too demanding on several fronts- for me to cut & run. I need the "security" - whatever the heck that means. i know...
i'm tryin to get a life more- doin more, goin more, keepin an eye open for my new direction.
you've had some journey - just lookin at your little history. sorry man-
But you're sounding very motivated today - i look forward to feelin it sometime (before i croak i hope). (being ready to blast out of here). i'm just not there-
