Agree with the other posters Peter. Do not kick yourself. Lessons learned. I know it is hard to not pursue, but really focus your efforts on detaching. Once you do, you will have a much easier time NOT pursuing, and that will do more for you and your chances at R than any pursuing ever will.

Best of luck to you

Me: 42
W: 32
Married 7 years together 8.5
S1: 7 S2:7
Bomb #1: 09-16-13
Recon #1: 11/13
A discovered 04-03-2014
W filed D 05-19-14 but never served me
I filed D 12-02-2014
S 05-31-14
Divorced 5-19-16