The above description is exactly what transpired in my M. I totally understand the need for sex. That was all me. What I didn't realize was that I had a void that she could never fill. It was because I didn't love myself or think I was worthy of love that I needed her to prove me wrong in the specific ways I thought I needed. It didn't end up well and my destroyed family is the result.
The book is codependent no more. It's eye opening.
Now, in my R, there truly WERE some issues with her understaning of y needs. However I didn't give a fair chance for her to hear those needs and make changes on her own because I NEEDED what I needed so badly I tried controlling behavior as opposed to giving her chance to decide who she wanted to be. So I'm not 100% convinced I can live with her most recent level of sexual giving if she wanted me back, but I know two things: 1) I have tons of room to grow healthier on my end which may allow me to accept less, and 2) she will be most likely to meet my needs if I'm not such a D-bag.
Bottom line I love her and our relationship enough to do the work I need to achieve those goals. I only hope I have the chance to try. You do. Please use it.
Thanks, Zues.
Last edited by Zues126; 07/11/1410:49 PM.
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
