Finally! Some progress!

[Oxford1]

Thank you all for the kind words, it's much appreciated.

I will be meeting WAW for the very first time since bomb on Friday for lunch. She asked me out!

She asked me to meet her for lunch today but I had meetings at work and politely declined.

We are still taking things really slow. We are flirting with each other like when we first met and I am letting her initiate contact about 75% of the time. I don't want to appear to be too eager. As time passes, I will slowly begin to balance it out.

Please note, I am NOT a veteran and I am FAR from truly piecing but I would like to share some things that seemed to help me. I hope you all can take something from this.

1. I went STRICT NC on the advice of the vets. I listened to everything the vets told me to do. Not once did I deviate. It was incredibly hard for me do. NC for me was exactly 30 days until she texted me about picking up her things from my house. I acted friendly and didn't fight her on it or ask questions. I finally initiated a text with her for the first time in week 7. It was friendly and I teased her.

2. I attended therapy and still am.

3. I prayed every night before I went to bed. First I thanked God for things I DID have (my family, my job, my daughter, my car). I also asked him to give me signs (good or bad) that I was moving in the right direction. Finally I asked him to restore my relationship if it was in HIS will. I continue to pray every night and thank him for the good things happening in my life.

4. I tried to help others on this board as opposed to only posting about my sitch all the time. It was cathartic for me and still is, hence this post.

5. When I did have contact with WAW, I always made sure to end the convo first. This was hard because I could text/talk to her for hours. I missed her so incredibly much.

6. I read Divorce Remedy about 30 times, lol.

7. Anytime I felt down, I would post here to vent. Anytime I felt like doing something crazy (pursuit), I would post here first and let people talk me off the ledge.

8. When the timing was right for me, I took a risk and contacted her. This was really scary for me as I was worried about backsliding and ruining things.

9. I listened to my mom when she told me "Let your faith be bigger than your fear". That was my mantra and I had to repeat it to myself 500x a day.

Thank you all for your support.

Thornton

Now we can have Thorn's 9 Rules.

Hey Thorn I am new to your thread. I was kind of to wrapped up in my stitch and was not paying attention to others. But decided I really needed to look and see what other folks are doing.

I especially like your moms quote:
"9. I listened to my mom when she told me "Let your faith be bigger than your fear". "

Anyhow unlike you my wife moved back on her own and sleeps in my bed. She just had run off to the OM country once before she came home and then once after.
Now he's coming to the USA and she plans on seeing him during daylight only in public as a friend!

I think that I am going to read your 9 rules above and your mothers quote over and over again on the days she is seeing him.

Glad I found your thread and glad things are going in the right direction!