1 step forward, 1000 steps back

[GoatGal]

In my case, my H is the ExOW's boss, she still works there.

They see each other regularly, and since many of their hookups took place in empty rooms/storage closets in the company buildings during regular work hours (I know, classy, right? Real romantic.), it's kind of hard to "trust" that nothing is going on now.


As for the "no contact" that we "agreed" upon initially, it had to be explained to H that "no contact" didn't just mean "no sexual contact". (Seriously).
They were going to ride to a meeting an hour away together two days later, and he says to me, "Well, it's not like we'll be alone in the car, Miss J. is driving..." !!!
So they'll be sitting in the back seat together, what--not looking at each other all goo-goo eyed?

Come on.

But he complied, no more calls/texts... I caught him with another phone that he'd stopped using and for some reason started again, hidden in his truck. It might have been legit, but there was one email to her saying"
"WORK QUESTION! (Heading) Call me tomorrow..something Miss J said."

I got really pissed, said, why can't she just answer the email with an email? Why does she need to CALL YOU?

Later that night when I was yelling at him over the phone about clearly breaking the no contact rule, he said "F-U!!!!!!!"
(Of course this was pre-DBing days.)

Over the last ten months I saw ONE call to her re: a closing due to weather. It was a one minute call.

But it showed me that he had NOT deleted or blocked her number as he's said.
True, I didn't see any other calls or texts, but even that upset me.

I think he mostly stood by the NC rule, but he wasn't about to let me tell him what to do.

The funny part is, when i looked at the call logs, it sure as heck looked like they'd already stopped calling/texting each other before I found out.

Later I found out H had exposed her to a blood-borne illness...he knew and didn't bother to tell her so she could protect herself.
Nice guy. That's REAL LOVE right there.
From what he said, I think she dumped him over that.
So she's not totally clueless.

But I don't think there is anything happening, at least at the moment.

H says "We're separated, so it doesn't matter anymore." Yeah, right. You filed, so it just washes away all my pain.

Well, it mattered to me VERY MUCH when I first found out.

I bothers me less now, but every now and again I get that *twinge*.

Supposedly she's been "looking' for another position, but clearly, not very hard. It's been almost a year....

She's back with her H... I know it's not DBing but I find out it's still going on I'd have half a mind to out the whole thing to her H and be done with it.

At that point, I'd have given up on my marriage anyway.

Ugh.

Sorry.


I had a "moment".


Anyhow, this is just food for thought.


----GGG