Me 47/W 34 T 16 M 13 No kids BD 6/2013 W asked that I move out 6/2013 I moved back and W is upset with this 12/2013 separate beds not much talking Served D Complaint 5/2014 W moved out 9/27/2014
Just a word to say how much I've been enjoying your story.
You were even in my dream last night! (And Cadet, and Wonka were there, and Maybell, Ssarah, and even rayzzz, many more, and Pilot. And Toto too!)
I was dreaming I was posting on this board.
And to you, Thornton, I said how I like a post ^^^ way above now, where you spoke about you followed DBIng, took advice---essentially humbled yourself and you can see it paying off. That's fantastic. I think it was someone else's thread where you talked (very eloquently, I thought) about how when you really changed your feelings, your perceptions, that even though she wasn't right there, your W picked up on this.
I've been experiencing a similar effect, not just with my H, but it's extending to the greater community.
It's like letting go and choosing to be happy gives off a better vibe---and like butterfly wings, it sends ripples out into the world and PEOPLE NOTICE.
It's so '60's man--- better vibes. But it's true.
Someone else said, one of my lady friends on here, that it's as if we're "glowing" with all this PMA and GALing stuff.
And if we can "glow" in our situations, well, that's really something to think about.
Anyhow.
Just to let you know.
I'm so proud of your progress!
---GGG
Me 54 Him 63 M 23 T 29 0 Kids Funny Farm of Rescues 12/12 OW-- 5/13 ILYBINILWY: A denied 9/13 Proof OW: ENDED 2/14 Got D papers on my BD I kicked him out for my sanity 9/14 He wants to "talk"?
Tomorrow is the big day! It will be the first time I've seen WAW face to face in 9 weeks. I don't feel nervous, surprisingly.
I plan on just having a nice time with her, we only have an hour as she will be on her lunch break. I'll keep it light and fluffy and make sure I smile lots
We are still texting each other back and forth and having conversations throughout the day. It's been nice.
WAW is planning on getting her own apartment soon, she is currently at her mom's house. This makes me a little nervous because if we turn things around, it will be at least a year before we co-habitate again. I am letting her do her thing, no pressure or whining.
Another concern I have is the amount of time we will be able to spend together. The apartment she is looking at is about 40 minutes away from where I live. I'm concerned this will start to feel like a long distance relationship because we won't see each other as often as we are used to.
On the other hand, it will give us plenty of space from each other. She did mention that she likes the "longing" feeling she has for me because it builds excitement for her when we do see each other. I don't get that, but it is what it is and I need to let her be her.
WAW is planning on getting her own apartment soon, she is currently at her mom's house. This makes me a little nervous because if we turn things around, it will be at least a year before we co-habitate again.
You know that doesnt mean anything. She could just as easily decide to move back in or get a closer apartment.
Another concern I have is the amount of time we will be able to spend together. The apartment she is looking at is about 40 minutes away from where I live. I'm concerned this will start to feel like a long distance relationship because we won't see each other as often as we are used to.
A bit of mindreading, but I would think she would end up feeling the same way about this as you do. You just have to be patient and see how it plays out. You already know that though.
On the other hand, it will give us plenty of space from each other. She did mention that she likes the "longing" feeling she has for me because it builds excitement for her when we do see each other. I don't get that, but it is what it is and I need to let her be her.
Sounds like she is excited because it feels new again. At least that would be a sign that you all are building a new relationship instead of rehashing the old crappy one.
M:33 W:30 T:10 M:2 B/D: 5/27/14 S: 5/28/14 Wife moved back in 7/18/14
Another concern I have is the amount of time we will be able to spend together. The apartment she is looking at is about 40 minutes away from where I live. I'm concerned this will start to feel like a long distance relationship because we won't see each other as often as we are used to.
On the other hand, it will give us plenty of space from each other. She did mention that she likes the "longing" feeling she has for me because it builds excitement for her when we do see each other. I don't get that, but it is what it is and I need to let her be her.
I can see how this would be a concern, but I'd take her sense of "longing" as encouragement. They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, and this could be a great way to fan some of those flames and to keep things exciting and intriguing at the start as you figure things out. It could also be a good way to ensure that you both don't rush in too quickly again.
M - 34 H - 36 Together 10 years Married 4 years BD - March, 2014
WAW is planning on getting her own apartment soon, she is currently at her mom's house. This makes me a little nervous because if we turn things around, it will be at least a year before we co-habitate again.
Means nothing Thorn other than she will be living in her own place for a while. Getting out of a lease is always possible. So do think of it as a year. Heck, it could be just a month or two. Use the time in the best way possible
Quote:
Another concern I have is the amount of time we will be able to spend together. The apartment she is looking at is about 40 minutes away from where I live. I'm concerned this will start to feel like a long distance relationship because we won't see each other as often as we are used to.
Again not important. 40 minutes is nothing. Especially because I suspect you will probably end up spending the night at each others places often.
Me: 42 W: 32 Married 7 years together 8.5 S1: 7 S2:7 Bomb #1: 09-16-13 Recon #1: 11/13 A discovered 04-03-2014 W filed D 05-19-14 but never served me I filed D 12-02-2014 S 05-31-14 Divorced 5-19-16
Another concern I have is the amount of time we will be able to spend together. The apartment she is looking at is about 40 minutes away from where I live. I'm concerned this will start to feel like a long distance relationship because we won't see each other as often as we are used to.
Look: this has been covered elsewhere, but perhaps it'll help to step out of your perspective; within London, where I live, this is the average journey length between any point A and point B!! It's a bit of a pain, but for many people it wouldn't remotely qualify as "long-distance". You'd say you have a local girlfriend, just in a different neighbourhood!
Forget that concern!
M:37 W:38 No kids Together since 2006, Married since 2010 EA discovered 06/07/2014 W moved out 06/08/2014
Very true Mat. My WAW wife is an hour drive away but really not that far away. Keep positive thoughts Thorn. You're doing great!!
M 35 W 31 D 10 Married 3 years Together 11 Single since Nov 13 Moved out Dec 13 ILYBNILWY, 'I don't want to be a boring housewife, 'I don't fancy you any more' OM confirmed Jun 14
