MM, Stop putting so damn much meaning into every damn thing he says! You still haven't gotten the number one rule "You can't believe a word they say and only half of what you see"! You know what I hear him saying? "I want to get all this stressful stuff out of the way so I can have fun"...stress the "I"! He is still all about him! He will no more "work" on the R after his RE deal is over as he will now. His mother's problems will be ongoing and will not end until she is no longer alive. Riding a Sea Doo is not a replacement for IC. If it was the "house" that stopped him from having a committed R then he would have suggested you BOTH move! (My W used this excuse as well. It was the "house" but she went and rented a house and didn't say "Well, let's have you move here with the kids and we can have a R". It's an excuse, nothing more!)Also of note is that the LAST thing on his list is "See where things are with MM".
One reason he keeps repeating himself is that he doesn't remember what he has said (or really care). While you spend hours and hours thinking about every word and trying to find "meaning" in each one, he is just saying what he MAY feel at that moment and it will change very quickly!
Look, I also see that my W is extremely "stressed". She is doing things that not only will end up hurting her but are hurting everyone she loves and loves her, even her own kids. I know that she is confused, stressed, under pressure, hurting, etc. Her GM has recently lost her mind to Alzheimer's, her mother is going through problems with her family over it and is leaning heavily on her, her work is more and more demanding, because she has moved she is low on cash, her father who she has always wanted in her life but never was and now is, is DYING of cancer, the list goes on. IT DOES NOT GIVE HER AN EXCUSE FOR WHAT SHE HAS DONE AND CONTINUES TO DO TO ME AND OUR M!! You are buying what he is selling you and it's a load of crap! You do not add to your stress by dumping the one person who has stuck by you for 20 years unless you just don't give a damn about them! Add to this that he has insulted you by trying to keep using you for "just" sex, not even FUN, just sex and you get a picture of a truly messed up guy who only really cares about himself. Heck, the thing that most bothers him about his mother's sitch is how HE has to help her and all the stress that puts on him! Again, all about him!
You've made progress over the last few weeks. Don't let him con you into backsliding.
