Dear MM, He didn't hear you at all. Once again, it was "all about HIM!". Life is a series of "stressful" events. There will ALWAYS be something that is stressing him. None of what he said explains how he only wanted you for "fun and sex", oh, wait, not even the fun! This is typical MLC behavior. You stopped pursuing him and now he wants you to start again so he can reject you again. There is a thread on this somewhere on this site and it is important reading especially in your sitch!
Don't get me wrong, you did well in your talk. Just remember "Believe none of what they say and half of what you see". He needs to deal with his situation with his mom and RE deal. None of that is any reason to discard a long R and start treating you the way he did.
I had several talks like that with my W before she left. Not only did she do a 180 just a little while later, she had no recollection of having said any of it. Even would say she never said such a thing. His chit show is not even close to over as it really has nothing to do with his RE deal or his mom's problems or the price of gas.... he is in crisis and isn't close to coming out yet. keep up with the detaching (he did notice) but don't do it just to get him back (hard distinction but important) do it for YOU. You have just really started to drop the rope and he has already noticed. The trick is until you drop it "for you", not to "get him" back, it won't work. All that will happen is once he thinks he has you back where he wants you, he will go right back to his Chit show!
You are doing much better MM. Keep moving forward. Don't let the fact that the progress you have made that is making a difference stop you from keeping going. At the beginning it's hard. You see a change and think "Oh, maybe he's coming back to his old self" so you stop and BAM!, things haven't really changed. Use this as a sign that dropping the rope and detaching is working because he see's the changes in YOU. You are a better person now and will be a better and better person as you move forward. Keep going!
