Hi Matt... tx for your concerns. I am watching & listening. I will be "partner" in the business I created with him. However, HE is trying to purchase the location from which we currently operate from. My only concern was how much he will charge OUR business to be on HIS property. I am not going to be held captive to a ridiculous amount of rent. He promised me he will be reasonable. Buying from an unreliable crack head has him spinning. However, he is a smart person and will not be unprotected. He told me that he will create another company so that he could be separate from the one we operate from. I believe this would protect me & my interest.
Hi Sandi... Yes, I think he should respond directly as well, however the invite came through to our email. In a few days I will ask him to respond himself.
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Last night: He was clearly stressed out & teary eyed about his life & his desire to get this property. He views it as a saviour to his sanity. This turned into a bit of R talk. I pointed out that I gave up on him a month ago. That I was disappointed that he didn't appreciate the gesture to reconcile.. He said that he has been soo busy (wrapped up in his deal), that he didn't know/see it. He is very overwhelmed. I told him that if the situation was reversed and he was the one suggesting reconciliation and it was not recognized that he would give up too. He said he noticed that I got "cold" from after our make out session and he didn't know what to make of it. (Guess he noticed my pull away). He "says" that he is still open to working on us AFTER the real estate deal is done. He has visions of this current location/operation as a "family business". He really enjoyed our dates/time spent as he felt relaxed and was having a nice time with me. For right now, he just can't handle any more. He was hopeful for more of that "after" he puts his mind to rest about his real estate deal. Then he wants to finalize our financial situation. much like he said before, get our deal behind us (he can't imagine arguing while seeing each other again), he doesn't want anyone to think that he swayed me by spending time with me "during" the process. Then he wants to spend time relaxing and seeing where things stand with us then. <<<< this confuses me. He feels pressure & his usual "i dunno" position. He was anxious to go & end the convo too. I kept the convo going because I wanted to be heard. I am not sure he was actually capable of hearing me. As he mentioned how his thoughts shift back to his real estate stuff while we are talking.
He says he's pretty sure that he knows how good we had it together & really enjoyed our life and time together & that even one of our clients mentioned to him just the other day how they could see our connection. I mentioned the "water your own grass" theory... he liked it. However, he feels that he hasn't quite put himself out there to know for sure. He feels that I have quite the social life, where he does not & still wants to have one...when his "chit show" is over & he can relax. Right now, he does not like to be around happy people or watch movies with happy couples. The other night he went out for an 1.5 hours & enjoyed himself. They said he looked 43! He liked that. He then felt good having an excuse to leave as his mom was home alone. He's not in the mood to fully be social.
At the end of the convo, I stated that I am not wasting my time waiting for him & that he needs to go figure his chit out. He admits he is completely confused and not ready to give it the time to put effort into the R that it needs/deserves. He kept saying he is not ready. I said I am not pushing him to "get ready" To go figure himself out & that he's too screwed up. I leaned in on his car & stated generally "do u really have to completely lose someone before you realize they are gone?" he replied "i guess so"..... again, I could see he was no longer receptive & paying attention to the convo.
He is like a dog, can only chase one stick at a time. He needs to be alone. He is being honest. How can he truly invest in a relationship when he has so many other things on the go that completely stress him out?
This is a lot of stress for him & he is pretty much at the end of his rope. He is expressing pure frustration with this real estate deal with reason. It truly is a "jerry springer show" with all of the unknown & lies & hoops that he is jumping through. He is so exhausted. I am concerned as he expressed that he is concerned that his driving is affected by all of this as well. He has A LOT of anger & doesn't know where to place it.
I know he "SAYS" all of this, and I am not banking on any of it. I just don't believe he said it this time as bait. He is truly confused/overwhelmed and it is obvious.
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When I came in & discussed it with my daughter last night & my friends today... they feel that I did well and held my ground & self value. My stomach tells me differently. I can't help but "feel" for him... "feel his pain". I hope that some of my comments made it through to him.
M:46 H:49 T:20yrs myD:22 H distant summer/12 H sleeping in b'ment: Nov/12 BD: Dec 2/12 asked me begin to move end of Jan/13 moved Jan 7/13 (left my stuff) "agreed" to "working on r" Mar 3/13(lipservice!)
