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It's just after midnight and now I've come to step 6 in DR that asks why noting changes and the last section is 'your spouse has decided your marriage is over'.

What a thought to (try to) go to sleep on. Feeling a bit low now.


M: 57 / EW: 52
T: 21, M: 8
S: 18, S: 15
Bomb: 1 Jun 14
EA Aug 2014 I think
PA Feb 2015 possibly sooner
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Originally Posted By: odsnt
Uh! LinkedIn just asked me if I know my wife. I wasn't expecting that and it just floored me: I'm not sure why.

I didn't connect.


I know why. it's because it's a symbol of her independence: something which I have always encouraged - it was me that found the job she now loves and spurred her on to go for it.

But I'm not part of the plan now and it hurts. My PMA is slipping, pass the tissues. Goodnight all.


M: 57 / EW: 52
T: 21, M: 8
S: 18, S: 15
Bomb: 1 Jun 14
EA Aug 2014 I think
PA Feb 2015 possibly sooner
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So, detachment could be improved then but I think everone has relapses from time to time. I managed to get a grip after a few minutes and read some more DR which was good.

PMA has not fully restored just yet though. A little of the mindfullness podcast is in order then on my cycle to work.

Have a good day everyone.

Last edited by odsnt; 07/09/14 06:41 AM.

M: 57 / EW: 52
T: 21, M: 8
S: 18, S: 15
Bomb: 1 Jun 14
EA Aug 2014 I think
PA Feb 2015 possibly sooner
Joined: Jun 2014
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A spot of GALing on Thursday. A book launch and then stayed with a friend.

Back home now and W has gone to visit an old school friend for the weekend so I may not even see her before I have to go back to work on Sunday. I'm planning a nice day out with the kids if only the great British weather would behave. Rain is forecast all Sunday :-( It's suposed to be summer for goodness sake!

On the way back home I finished off reading DR. Those stories at the end are inspirational. I still managed to feel a bit down the nearer I got home though. I just couldn't pull it around today. Even my mindfullness podcast didn't work.

I've mostly been feeling upbeat the past couple of weeks, refusing to let any negative thoughts ruin my day. I suppose you can't hold it together all the time.

The kids have cheered me up though. I wasn't using them to cheer me up, it was just good to be back with them again.


M: 57 / EW: 52
T: 21, M: 8
S: 18, S: 15
Bomb: 1 Jun 14
EA Aug 2014 I think
PA Feb 2015 possibly sooner
Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,106
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Here's a STOPP card my counsellor gave to me in case of 'emergencies'.

STOPP
Take a breath
Observe: What am I thinking?
What am I reacting to?
What am I feeling in my body?
Pull back: Put in some perspective.
See the bigger picture.
Is this fact or opinion?
How would someone else see this?
Practise what works: What's the best thing to do for me, for others, for this situation?


M: 57 / EW: 52
T: 21, M: 8
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EA Aug 2014 I think
PA Feb 2015 possibly sooner
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odsnt, great job having a good time with your kids and keeping an upbeat attitude.

I really liked your STOPP card. It's helpful.


Me-54 yrs; W: 50 yrs
4 kids- D: 22,20,19; S:15
"Trial" Divorce: 04/14 - 6/14
Separated: 06/2013- divorced 08/2016

“The strongest of all warriors are these two — Time and Patience.” War and Peace
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Thanks odsnt, will be copying this and carrying it with me smile

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What's the best way to stop Carole King's 'It's Too Late Baby' invading your head space?

It certainly doesn't help that our intranet is called Tapestry.


M: 57 / EW: 52
T: 21, M: 8
S: 18, S: 15
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EA Aug 2014 I think
PA Feb 2015 possibly sooner
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I don't want to hurt you, but your wife is displaying all the signs of having an affair. Overnight work events, going away to visit "old girlfriends" and not wanting to work on the marriage are classic signs of an affair going on.

This would be why she is acting the way she is. If she wasn't having one, then there would be no reason that she wouldn't give your marriage at least a chance.

Just my opinion.


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Hi odsnt, that's an easy one! Think of the 'Chipmunk song', Macerrena or Gangem Style, or some other equally annoying song, and that also makes you smile, and you will have it out of your head in no time!


Me-54 yrs; W: 50 yrs
4 kids- D: 22,20,19; S:15
"Trial" Divorce: 04/14 - 6/14
Separated: 06/2013- divorced 08/2016

“The strongest of all warriors are these two — Time and Patience.” War and Peace
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