Thanks for dropping in! I'm pulling for you to continue to succeed. It's nice to watch others at that stage. Yes, it's very difficult for sure. My W had the kids last night, and she asked me to come in and chat with her, but I demurred, as I had some GAL that I had to do. Took everything I had to not change my plans
Apparently it was a rough night, and then this AM was even worse. Typically I call to say goodnight and good morning to the kids. She's finding this irritating.
She texted me this AM to let me know she has decided to keep the OM in her life, but she's not sure in what capacity. I haven't responded yet, because I had an appointment with IC. I don't control what she does and what she chooses anyways. Then, she was late for drop off and broke down, calling the kids "wretched and despicable". I can't handle hearing that. Who does that in front of their own kids?
And then it hit me. Someone in a very bad place, hurting, feeling horrible about their own abilities and parenting abilities. We all have bad days, but anytime she has the kids, it's like this. This is the place my W is in right now. She needs to get better, whether that is with me or without me.
I didn't get mad or upset about her freaking out and changing the times etc. She apologized a bit later, saying sorry by text, and then saying she was at her tipping point. I acknowledged that must feel horrible, and offered to take the kids. And that was that.
I need to address the OM continued contact. But I truly feel that it is diminishing anyways. However, we will be marching down one pathway with me being the best father, and person I can be. Whether at some point that means spouse as well, will have to be determined.
I truly need to keep the focus on me. Two things I am confused about though. Why did she tell me she's keeping the OM in her life, is she testing me? And the other is I truly think she needs help with the kids. I hope she realizes this herself. I keep fighting the urge to protect my kids and not rescue her. It's a tough battle.
