New here - frozen in should I stay or should I go?

[Old Dog]

Sorry to see you on here apathy, but you will get good advice from DBers.

I'm also sorry to say that yes, some of us idiots only really wake up to reality at the 11th hour or when it's too late. I can hear my wife saying some of the things you recount.

I went to transactional analysis counselling around 20 years ago now. I was depressed and thought it would speed up the process. I learnt a few things about myself, but after a while I felt it was just some big talking shop.

My wife and I also went to marriage counselling briefly, but again it was just more talking. I didn't get how any of this was going to change anything.

I have learnt so much more in the past month since Bday by reading BD, (half of) DR, psycology today website and my new counsellor who is SFBT/SBT.

And now I want to change and I believe I can do it and I want it, I need it for myself. I hope my wife will see it and reconsider, but in the words of the vets here, I have no expectations.

Sorry, that was a bit more tha I planned to say. Let me just say, read the books and forums because in the long run, you'll learn from it I'm sure.