New here - frozen in should I stay or should I go?

[Shanti]

I want to commend you.... you seem to be the one recognizing there is repair and healing that needs to be done.

Thank you, but H has done alot of work on himself in the past two years while I've pretty much been sitting in judgement.

Please keep an open mind during this process, and keep your heart open to what the future may (or may not) bring.

I'm trying :-)

At worst, you will make yourself into a better stronger person. At best you will find renewed love and save your marriage.

Either of which (or both) would be an improvement from where I am now. Something's gotta change!
DR should be here in a few days and I'm planning on researching SBT today.

Thank you for taking the time to help!