"reason i say i dont know if i want to stay is because i feel really hurt and betrayed by her speaking to that son of a b-itch. She spoke to him for 6 months. Yeah they were friends but behind my back? If that was me she would have accused me of cheating and probably stabbed me."
Still haven't learned have you? She felt safe talking to him about her M problems because you didn't want to listen. She needed that. In fact, she was afraid at how you would react if you found out, so kept it hidden from you. She was right. Look at how you overreacted and STILL act towards him even though he tried helping you too. If you're looking at calling him an SOB, look in the mirror.
"I want it to work but i dont want this pain anymore. I feel disrespected and at the same time guilty for neglecting her."
That's why you need help. You don't want the pain? Sorry, that's a consequence of YOUR actions.
"i want to build a solid foundation. Shes going counselling every wednesday and said shes going so she will never ask for a divorce again or put me through that."
I seriously think that you need to go to C yourself and learn how to communicate better with your W. That's what YOU need to work on.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
