today was a pretty good day, for all my fatigue(three boys sleeping with me at one point-so not much sleeping going on!) I sent an inbox msg to h at midnight last nigh to say happy bday, and we had a light chat, confirmed we would be there this morning to wish him happy bday and give his presents. we got there, he loved his gifts from the boys , I opted to get him a really nice framed picture of him with the boys and movie tickets for him and eldest son to see transformers 4 together. I wanted to give h something but not spend money or look like was trying to win affections, I made one of those 'survival kits', with the little poem "a marble for when you lose yours, an eraser to erase all the little mistakes. a balloon to help blow out all the hot air" etc, he said he loved it so I was happy. it was just something lighthearted to acknowledge his day.
I asked if he still wanted to have lunch with the boys and myself, since we had seen him that morning and that he would be having dinner with the boys at his mothers, he said he was still happy to do it, and yay for me, I didn't do my usual "are you sure, you don't have to" etc
so we had a quick lunch, I bought the boys home and that was that until h rang and said he was having a couple of drinks with some guys from work and could I drop the boys off at his mums, I got a little annoyed, he probably heard it, but I did it anyway. then I had to pick them up after dinner, and I picked a small fight, I felt niggly, a little bit used, and I let it show. but after I got home, I texted to say sorry, hoped he a good day and to enjoy the rest of his night, he responded saying he would help out if he can, and thanks for his presents, I simply responded with our pleasure(not just mine)
deep breaths today, I just keep telling myself its all going to be ok.
