Dealing with WAW Part 2

[labug]

labug,
An example of something unreasonable she is asking for is she wants to be compensated for her 'marital contribution' to our airplane. Since our airplane is owned under an LLC (strictly for liability protection...I am the sole member) her belief is that she is owed half of everything that has ever been spent on the airplane since we were married. Which would come out to about $100k for her.

Why is that unreasonable? Did marital assets purchase and maintain the aircraft?

I'm not an atty, don't even play one on TV but I'd check this out with one before you get too firmly entrenched. Is it a business asset purchased and maintained with business proceeds? Otherwise, it seems it would be part hers. Again, peanut gallery advice.

I probably do have an adversarial mindset when it comes to D, because that is exactly what a D is.

It is if you allow your mind to tell you that it is. It doesn't have to be. And again, that doesn't mean you roll over and play dead,

I have spent hundreds of thousands in L fees over the years for many different lawsuits (on both sides) so I am fully aware of just how adversarial lawsuits can be.

Wow, maybe you are an adversarial guy. That's just sad. I can understand why it gets your nerves jangling.

Were the lawsuits worth whatever the outcome was?

A D is no different...it is a lawsuit.

True. And you get to define how that goes with your thoughts and your actions.

What are your values, what is your mission in life?

How do you see yourself?

What kind of father and husband would you like to be seen as?

Is "winning" a big deal for you?

I have no responsibility to do anything.

You've said this a couple of times, and I don't understand it. Can you explain more fully what you mean?

My reluctance to pay for anything while S stems from a defensive posture. IF I pay the cc bills under her name while S, and our D proceeds in front of a judge, I would be very hard pressed to argue I was unable to pay them if I was already paying them.

This is how you're choosing for this to be adversarial. Is there another way that this could be done?

If W gets stuck with bills that drain her resources after D, well, that is not really a concern of mine after a D.

Really? You have 2 babies with her who need care, so I don't see how financially kneecapping her helps them. Again, I'm not saying you roll over, just think about your motives, your choices and the consequences of those choices, not just to you. Your sons are watching you.

Bottom line is I have no idea where her mindset is right now. I really have not spent much time thinking about it to be honest. Her attitude has warmed significantly towards me, that is a given. She is showing much more initiative to interact with me than prior to S. She has even 'caved' on her hardline of moving back to where we lived prior to our S and seems fine with moving to the area I will be living. While these events do not mean a R is around the corner, they are positive signs. So I want to protect my steps forward, but I also want to protect myself should the D continue.

I don't think it matters what her mindset is, the important thing is your mindset.

And that's the only thing you can control.